I’m feeling a bit feisty this evening, you have been warned.
As I mentioned in the last blog post, there are many things that I consider sharing on here, but I often forget half of it. The creative juices are flowing, so in no particular order whatsoever….
Loudmouth chewing/slurping/gum smacking, also known as misophonia. I don’t know why the noise bothers me so much, but the noise is like fingernails across a chalkboard to me. Also in this category is the noise of a spoon that is hitting the inside of a ceramic mug (coffee stirring) or inside of a bowl as someone attempts to get every last bit of ice cream/soup/cereal or whatever. Sure, give your coffee a stir and eat your meal, but for the love of god quit clanging the spoon around. If the last bit of food is too little to be picked up by your spoon, guess what YOU’RE DONE! If you’re still hungry, then get another serving.
Smacking your gum/chewing it with your mouth open drives me mental. Just the constant noise while you’re smacking and talking at the same time. For the love of god, close your mouth, you look like a cow chewing its cud. Yes the word CUD refers to partially digested food, not to be confused with COULD, as in Could you close your mouth when chewing your gum? Good segway.
Stop spelling like a toddler (unless you are a toddler than no offense). Spelling these words improperly is not cute.
Should, as in texting doesn’t mean you SHOULD shorten this word to SHUD.
Could, as in you COULD try using proper grammar in your posts so you don’t come across as an idiot. Stop shortening COULD with CUD as it has a totally different meaning, see above.
Would, as in WOULD you please stop shortening these words because it drives me mental everytime I read it a small part of me dies inside. The word you want to use is WOULD, not WUD.
I am not a member of the grammar police, as I am pretty laid back when common words such as their, there, they’re, where, wear, hear, here, our, your, you’re, affect, effect are misused. I know that autocorrect may be involved and sometimes it’s just a typo, so I overlook it. I have a hard time overlooking SHUD, WUD, and CUD because that person isn’t even trying.
People that feel the need to have their conversations on Speaker while they are out in public. While you may think the world revolves around you, I can assure you that it does not. The only person that should be listening to your phone conversation is YOU. Nobody wants to hear your drama, or you talking like a badass, or hear about how drunk/high you were or how much of an asshole your boyfriend is. *NEWSFLASH* NOBODY CARES!!!!!!!!!
Passive/Aggressive (Attention seeking) posts on Facebook. I know that you’ve seen them, we’ve all seen them and perhaps some of us are guilty of this annoying trend. Posts that read something like this: FML Could My Day Get Any Worse! Basically, the poster is hoping to bait someone into asking “What’s wrong?” because they desperately want to talk about it, but don’t want to come out and say it. Drives me mental! Honestly, I tend to snooze a few “friends/family” that do that constantly. I can’t be bothered with your drama.
Also, those that are constantly seeking attention with their posts like: Let’s lift each other up! Post your favorite picture of ME so I can comment on it.
Seriously? I refuse to go through your 100+ selfies, repost it on your page so that you can comment on yourself. I also don’t COPY/PASTE or TYPE AMEN either. I will share to spread awareness, I will share when a child or dog goes missing in the area, but I will not soothe your ego. If you need constant attention, get a dog. If you’re wondering why you are still single…. Here’s why. It’s one thing to feel needed, it’s another to be needy.
Askholes, yes ASKHOLES. You know the types, those friends/family that always come to you for advice for their relationship issues, financial issues or any situation where they want you to listen and give examples of how they can fix their situation. Being the good person that you are, you give great advice and cite a few examples to which your friend thinks are great! You’re a lifesaver! The next week rolls around and they are still in the same sad situation. Your advice was not followed, they decided to try it their way (because that’s worked out so well in the past). Your friend comes looking for more advice, to which you find that you are repeating yourself and the Askhole cycle continues. Short of taking matters into your own hands, you can’t help an askhole because askholes require drama in their life. Consider yourself warned.
There are more examples, but I think I will save those for a work related pet peeve post in the very near future.
To be continued…. ~Hannah