Abuse comes in many forms, Health Care, Not the Popular Opinion, Politics, Religious Beliefs, Stigma/Taboo, Women's Health

My Body, I have the final word.

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Welcome back blog readers,

Just a bit of fair warning, If you don’t want to read what I have to say about my views on abortion, then carry on about your day.

I know this topic may generate different points of view, that is perfectly fine as long as we can agree to keep things civil. My opinion on this matter is that it’s my body, I should have the final word. Just as it is your body and you should have the last word. While it’s nice to have all of the facts, and I do mean facts, not religious beliefs, or opinions I’d like the right to choose what is best for me. I don’t want men that have no experience being pregnant making choices for me. I don’t want any religious group making decisions for me.

The choice to go through with an abortion is very personal, can we agree on that? Why would I want the government stepping in or religious groups that I have no affiliation with telling me what is best for me and my body?  I don’t. I don’t want that for anyone as they are not the ones who have to live with that choice, the guilt, remorse, or deal with any complications that might come after the abortion takes place.

Do I think making the choice of having an abortion is easy? No, absolutely not.

It’s also not right to pass judgment on a woman who is making a choice to have an abortion. Those groups that linger around the family planning clinics, protesting, yelling, harassing women that enter/leave are despicable. Those groups assume all those that enter are going in for an abortion when that is not the case. Not to say that some of those appointments are for a consultation, more often than not, many of those appointments are related to reproductive health and have nothing to do with seeking an abortion. Frankly, what women go in for is between them and their doctor/ OBGYN, not you or anyone else.

You may feel that abortion is not right for you, that is fine, that is your choice. That doesn’t give you the right to pass judgment or pass laws that make that choice for anyone else. In many cases the decision to have an abortion isn’t just a matter of Oops, we didn’t use protection. Incest, Rape are things to consider as to why a woman might choose to have an abortion. In some cases the mother to be might have health related issues that may prevent her from carrying full term, her life may be at risk and therefore the baby’s life as well. Most people don’t consider that possibility, they only hear abortion, and their mind goes straight to MURDERER. Not everything is as black and white.

Not every woman has the support of the father to be. Not every woman has the support of her family. Maybe you do, many of us don’t. Can you understand why a woman with no father to be, no parents, no family in her life finds out that her life is at risk if she carries full-term might consider saving herself over losing her life along with the fetus?

Is it really better to force a woman to give birth only to be at a higher risk for postpartum depression, she has no support and her newborn baby is found in a dumpster?

Yes, I’m fully aware that adoption is available. As easy as it is to sit back and claim that you would make a choice to put the baby up for adoption when that time comes is all well and good until you are in that position and are put on the spot. For some of us, going through the 9 months of carrying a baby only to give it up is not as easy as it sounds.

I find that many Pro-Lifers are hypocrites, not all but many. They prefer that the woman carries full term, give that baby a chance at life. Until the baby is born, the mother who has no support goes on welfare/government assistance for 18 years or the child ends up homeless or in the foster system and their tune changes. Pro-Lifers fight for a child to be born, not for that child to be fed, housed, educated or to see that the child receives health care. That’s not Pro-life, that’s Pro-Birth.

A choice that I make for me and my body may not be a choice that you make for yourself and your body, that’s okay. I believe that you and everyone else has the right to CHOOSE what is in your best interest. If not having an abortion is best for you, Great! Don’t have one that is your choice. Isn’t it nice to have an option and not be forced to do something against your will, especially when it’s your body we’re talking about?

If there are doctors that are fine with performing abortions, more power to them. Let them help women that require it. The same goes for doctors that are okay with helping patients with terminal illnesses, they know they are on limited time and want the chronic pain and suffering to end. The option for physician-assisted suicide is not for everyone, but that doesn’t mean the option shouldn’t be available for those who want it. This goes for medical professionals that don’t want to perform surgeries that go against the morals/beliefs, they shouldn’t have to. It’s all about CHOICE and the freedom to be able to make a choice for yourself, not have one forced on you.

You may not want something, or opt for a procedure, that is fine. Your beliefs should not stop somebody else from choosing that for themselves as their choice has no effect on you whatsoever.

I am not owned by anyone, I am not the property of the government, I answer to myself and want the freedom to choose. I want you to have the freedom to choose.

For those curious minds, while it is not your business, I will clarify before the question gets asked; NO I have not had an abortion, I have never been pregnant because that was MY CHOICE.

 

 

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Speaking from Experience, Stigma/Taboo, TMI, Women's Health

Women’s Health

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Welcome back blog readers,

This blog post will cover topics that deal with women’s health, periods, cramping, PMS and the monthly joys we as women have to endure, and by endure, I mean suffer. Consider yourself warned, no hard feelings if you choose to stop reading now. I get it, some things fall under TMI (too much information).

I feel inclined to share my experience on this matter because after 28 years of suffering, let’s be honest, it’s not a joyous occasion; I seem to fall (yet again) into a one size fits all (except for me) category. While yes I have regular periods, no major complications but since I was a teenager I have had what I call “really bad months”.

Here is where the TMI comes in as I explain what I deal with during these “really bad months”. The PMS symptoms are normal, lower backache, water retention, bouts of irritability, craving chocolate, sleep less than normal, all of which is pretty standard for me.

Here’s where it’s not so normal, when the “really bad month” shows up, it’s typically the first heavy flow day. When I say heavy I mean going through an overnight pad every 2-4 hours kind of heavy. I should mention that I’m only 5 feet tall and my weight has fluctuated from 112 in high school to 142 now.

On these days (which are hard to predict) I experience severe cramping, my body temperature fluctuates from normal, to feeling feverish, to the point where I practically strip down (that is the only warning I get the severe cramps that have me doubled over and the quick temperature change). Once those appear, I have learned that I have maybe 15 minutes to get home and to the bathroom where I spend a good hour sitting on the throne, severely cramping, feeling like I want to die it hurts so bad, heavy bleeding, sweaty/clammy as I sit with a small fan blowing directly on me, bouts of diarrhea and a bucket to vomit in all happening at the same time. Sorry for the visual, I’m being honest.

That’s not even the end of it, just the first hour. Once I feel safe enough to get off of the throne (usually when the chills set in), I bring the vomit bucket into the bedroom and put on some fresh comfy stretchy clothes and try to sleep off the severe cramping and fight off the chills for the next hour or two. Once that finally passes, I feel great and the cramping over the next 3-4 days is minimal and the loss of blood is considerably less.

I have talked to a few doctors and OBGYN’s about my concerns and they have offered nothing in support or advice except to say that they don’t feel it’s anything to worry about since it doesn’t happen “every month”. The really bad months show up at least twice a year, they were more frequent during my teens through my late 20’s. If these symptoms happening all at once are “normal” then I am the only one I know that deals with it. If this is “normal” why was it never mentioned in Sex Ed or talked about by other women?

The worse episode happened in my ealy 20’s while I was at work (45 minutes from home). I was in the middle of talking to a customer and experienced tunnel vision and a slight loss of hearing (almost blacked out standing up). I had to excuse myself to get to the bathroom. That had never happened before, or since. I had to call my brother to pick me up and drive me home. The neighbors saw him walk me up the stairs and assumed I was drunk. They heard through the grapevine that I was bleeding heavily and almost blacked out, to which they assumed I had a miscarriage.  I was neither drunk nor have I ever been pregnant.

During my many years of suffering through this I have found that I really have to hydrate a few days before I expect my period to start. Staying hydrated seems to help keep the bad months at bay, or at the very least it has cut the time of suffering in the bathroom down. In any case there doesn’t seem to be name or cure or any information that makes sense as to why it happens.

My best guess is that my body loses too much blood to quickly, sending my body into shock as it tries to regulate the temperature.

I’d love to hear your thoughts if you experience something similar or if you have better advice.

The joys of being a woman…… ~ Hannah